


Feel Your Heartlines

by Darkshines1984



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-29
Updated: 2018-04-29
Packaged: 2019-04-29 21:25:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,617
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14481501
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Darkshines1984/pseuds/Darkshines1984
Summary: Continuation of the Friday 27th April scene when Charity suggests Vanessa makes it up to her properly and they sneak off into the back of the pub. Lots of emotions and sex...or emotional sex.Also prompted by @oliviabensonismywife who suggested I write it…after I had already started. Great minds and all that.





	Feel Your Heartlines

Charity grasped Vanessa’s hand as they made their way up the stairs to her bedroom. Just minutes before she had been worried that Vanessa had walked away for the last time but instead the other woman was full of surprises.

Vanessa hadn’t gone very far. Charity had been surprised to find her sat at the bar nursing a pint. She’d expected Vanessa to preach at her again even though she had begged her not to. Charity knew that it was hard for the smaller woman to understand how being anywhere near Bails made her feel – how the idea of taking him on terrified her.

Part of her wanted to try – wanted to protect other young girls from him. The larger part of her just couldn’t stomach the fight. Couldn’t stomach others finding out when her history was dredged up all over again. Telling Vanessa had been one thing – Vanessa wasn’t judgemental – just hot headed and naïve. The other people in the village were another matter entirely – how many times had other people thrown her history of prostitution in her face?

Tracy wasn’t some lost teenage girl and she was more clued up than her older sister gave her credit for. The last thing Charity wanted to do was ruin Tracy’s new venture on the task force because she was sure the younger woman would be damn good in the role. She had warned Bails off and just because he had paid her for her silence over her own past didn’t make that warning any less real. If he moved on Tracy now and Charity accused him he could hardly claim his innocence after paying her off. It screamed guilt – so Charity hoped he was smart enough to keep his hands of her girlfriend’s younger sister.

The money was an easy way out, but she could do a damn site more with twenty thousand pounds then she could with a conviction. Especially with the way Joe Tate was climbing all over Noah and splashing out on him. If she hadn’t felt the need to compete with Joe, then she’d have probably told Bails to stuff his cash and left him on tenterhooks. Joe and his flash cash did exist though and now Charity had something to counter him with. Plus, one of Vanessa’s big fears about being suspended was the drop in her income – that she’d have to use all her savings over this year to stay afloat. Now – if Ness would let her – Charity could help on that front.

 She had been so deep in thought that she’d zoned out and hadn’t noticed they were now in her bedroom – until Vanessa cupped her cheeks with both hands and tilted her head so they made eye contact.

“Hey” Vanessa said softly – “you okay?”

Charity looped her arms around her girlfriend’s waist, flattening her hands against Vanessa’s shoulder blades and pulling her close.  The other woman wrapped one arm around Charity’s shoulders – the other hand softly caressing Charity’s cheek with the knuckles of her fingers.

It had taken her a while to get comfortable with this level of affection. It had always come easily with Vanessa in a post sex haze – cocooned in one of their beds and wrapped up in their own reality. Open affection at other times – well that had slowly become part of their relationship. Now it was the thing that Charity yearned for the most. A kiss on the cheek here, a hug there – linking arms as they walked, holding hands as they sat together. Their relationship had become more than she had ever dreamed possible – more than she really deserved. There was always that fear that sat deep in her chest – that eventually Vanessa would realise she deserved better than some broken, messy, angry woman – that she’d leave just like everyone else. Sometimes when Charity would panic and push Vanessa away she was convinced it would be the last time Vanessa would tolerate her.

“I’m sorry I disappointed you” Charity choked.

Her voice came out thicker and more emotional than she’d expected. Despite her determination that she had to make the best decision for her and her own emotional wellbeing – she did feel guilty and disappointed in herself for taking the money – and scared of what Vanessa now thought of her. There was no winning hand in the situation though – either choice dragged her down a rabbit hole. She’d just picked the hole easier to climb out off. That was her all over though – always taking the easy option.

“Charity that’s not -” Vanessa stuttered and stumbled – before giving up on whatever she was trying to say.

Vanessa tilted her head and closed the gap between them, softly kissing the corner of Charity’s mouth before covering Charity’s lips with her own. She melted into the affection her girlfriend was showing her. She’d always understood actions better than words and if this was Vanessa’s way of telling her that everything was okay then that was fine by Charity.

Vanessa’s hands slipped under Charity’s patterned top and eased it up over her body. She took advantage of the break in their kissing to return the favour and remove Vanessa’s charming stripped jumper. Vanessa’s blue shirt followed next – both of their hands fumbling over the buttons as they kissed deeply. Once the buttons were undone Charity slipped her hands under the shirt – moaning as her hands slid across the smooth skin covering Vanessa’s ribs – and gently pushed the clothing off the smaller woman’s body. They broke the kiss for long enough to remove each other’s jeans, underwear and all, leaving each other in just their bra’s.

Vanessa gently guided her back onto the bed and Charity lay down – expecting her girlfriend to lie on top of her. Instead Vanessa straddled her thighs and pulled Charity into a sitting position via her bra straps. Their upper bodies pressed against each other – Vanessa now the same height if not slightly taller than Charity. Vanessa was looking at her with such reverence and adoration that it made Charity’s heart feel like it was skipping a beat and her breath catch in the back of her throat. She grasped at the back of her girlfriend’s neck, pulling her in so that their lips collided again in a desperate kiss.

Charity’s hands danced over as much exposed skin as she could reach – finally settling on the clasp of her girlfriend’s bra. She unhooked it swiftly and slowly drew the straps down from Vanessa’s shoulders – throwing it in the direction of their other discarded clothing.

Vanessa mirrored her actions, undoing Charity’s black bra with one swift flick of a very dexterous hand. Then the smaller woman’s arms were encircling her again and tugging her as close as possible. As she pulled her in Vanessa shifted from her knees, so she was completely sat in Charity’s lap – her legs wrapping around Charity and pulling them even closer.

“Ness” Charity moaned as they pressed naked and deliciously together.

She doubted she would ever tire of the sensation of Vanessa’s skin against her own. It had been addictive from their first night together. As tentative as Vanessa had been at first, she had still managed to rock Charity’s world as much as Charity had rocked hers. She had just been better at hiding it than the vet – or so she had thought.

They continued to kiss – their mouths meeting in a well-rehearsed balance of lips, teeth and tongue – Vanessa putting everything into the kiss and Charity matching her. Both sets of hands explored each other’s skin – nails lightly scraping over the more sensitive areas – causing them to arch and strain against each other. They were teasing each other, building the tension and arousal slowly and purposefully. Vanessa grazed her hands up Charity’s rib cage – thumbs flicking across straining nipples before carrying on higher – burying both of them in Charity’s hair.

Vanessa tugged lightly at the blonde locks – angling her head to the side so the smaller woman had better access to the right side of her neck. Vanessa mouth descended from her lips, across her jaw and down – grazing teeth over the parts she knew to be most sensitive. Charity’s whole body shook against her girlfriend and she could feel her clit pulsing and twitching in response.

“Ness please – I need -”

The words slipped unbidden from Charity’s mouth. With anyone else she’d have been horrified that she was resorting to begging but not with Vanessa. There would be no reproach or mockery from her girlfriend for the display of weakness. It only ever sparred Vanessa on to pleasure her more and was never mentioned once morning rolled around.

The other woman brought her mouth back to Charity’s and kissed her soundly. Vanessa wriggled back onto her knees without breaking the kiss and pushed Charity back onto the bed – following her down without breaking the contact between them. Vanessa was balancing above her by propping herself up on her left elbow (positioned to the side of Charity’s head). The smaller woman’s right hand slowly moved down her body – fingertips lightly grazing over Charity’s skin and leaving a trail of heat in their wake. The hand stopped at Charity’s hip and lingered there drawing a whimper from Charity as she slammed her eyes shut in anticipation.

“Charity look at me” Vanessa demanded.

She opened her eyes and looked directly at her girlfriend – instantly lost on the contrasting bright blue and blown black pupils of Vanessa’s eyes. There was a storm of emotion on the other woman’s features. There was a reverence there that still caught Charity off guard each time she saw it, but it was mixed with something else. It was the sort of pleading look that Vanessa had been aiming her way all week about the Tracy situation but in a very different context. Charity was about to question the expression when Vanessa spoke up.

“What do you want me to do?” her girlfriend asked, voice thick with emotion – “I’ll do anything you want – everything you want.”

As she spoke Vanessa moved the hand from Charity’s hip and slipped two fingers through her soaking wet folds. Charity’s hips bucked against the contact and she had to fight the urge to slam her eyes shut. She couldn’t prevent the moan that slipped from between her lips as those fingers slowly circled her clit.

The question and subsequent declaration caught Charity off guard as she knew Vanessa was talking about something more than just the sexual connotation. Charity could feel her girlfriend’s emotions in every word and every touch. It would have scared her not all that long ago – probably still had the potential to scare her – when everything became so totally raw and honest between them. The raw emotion had been there during their more intimate moments but never talk like this. Vanessa’s fingers kept her grounded though – the two of them sliding lower before slowly penetrating her. Sliding them nearly fully out of Charity before slowly thrusting them back in – setting a maddeningly slow rhythm.

“I would do anything for you” Vanessa continued – her emotions completely unguarded - “I just wish you could see that.”

Charity had no idea what to say or even if she was meant to reply. She was starting to believe that what Ness was saying was true – that the smaller woman really could be the person for her and that Vanessa would stay when others had always run. She’d told Noah as much - that Vanessa was different – that she trusted her. It was hard to argue with Vanessa sincerity when they were looking deep into each other’s eyes and the other woman’s where glossy with emotion.

“I wish you could see past the fourteen-year-old girl and stop beating yourself up -  because you are worth SO much more than you ever give yourself credit for.”

Charity could barely see her girlfriend now – her eyes had filled with tears not just at the words but the real sincerity behind them. She let out a strangled sob and clung tighter to Vanessa, burying her face in the junction of her girlfriend’s neck and shoulder. Charity wasn’t sure what was making her head spin more – Vanessa’s words which only served to strip back more layers and beat down more of her walls or the steady thrusting of her girlfriend’s fingers inside her – curling and hitting all the right places. 

“You are worth so much more to me” Vanessa added – her voice cracking with emotion.

Charity knew her own tears would be soaking Vanessa’s shoulder, but she could also feel moisture rolling down on to her forehead, suggesting Vanessa was crying too. This emotional barrage wasn’t quite what she had in mind when she suggested make up sex, but it would be a lie to say that the other woman’s words hadn’t touched at something deep inside her. She had always wanted someone to love her completely and without any shame. Had never believed that anyone could. Then Vanessa had come along and took a sledgehammer to every barrier she had ever constructed.  

“Ness” she moaned the other woman’s name – desperate to be able to think of something profound to be able to say in return. It was hard to think clearly when her girlfriend was building her so steadily and determinedly towards oblivion though.

“What do you need?” Vanessa turned her head and whispered in Charity’s ear.

“This – just you – just you babe,” Charity replied breathlessly, barely able to string her words together.

Vanessa made an unintelligible sound in response and picked up the rhythm of her fingers and added a third - the smaller woman undulating her hips to help push each thrust that bit deeper. Charity’s eyes were still filled with tears, but she brought her head up from the crook of her girlfriend’s neck to join their lips together again. Each of Vanessa’s thrusts causing Charity to moan into the other woman’s mouth so the kiss quickly became a simple pressing of lips together as her girlfriend swallowed up the sounds she was emitting.

When Charity reached her peak she came hard and loud – far louder than she should considering it was still only late afternoon and there were plenty of punters in the pub below them. Her cries were barely muffled against Vanessa’s mouth as her whole body jerked and shook against her girlfriend. Vanessa held her through it, still slowly pumping her fingers as much as Charity’s spasming muscles would allow, as Charity clung at the smaller woman’s shoulders like her life depended on it. Perhaps, in some way it felt like it really did.   

She continued to cling to Vanessa long after it subsided as her girlfriend collapsed down onto her and then rolled them to they were lying on their sides. Charity buried her head in Vanessa’s neck again and curled around her – holding them together so close she could feel Vanessa’s erratic heartbeat as hard as she could feel her own.

“You can’t leave me now” she blurted out breathlessly - “you can’t say all those things to me and then leave.”

The words fell out of her mouth unbidden. Vanessa had opened her up with her own admissions and promises and now Charity was unable to hold her own fears in. She had never let anyone in that far before and it was both thrilling and terrifying. If Vanessa left it would be a cut to deep. One she couldn’t imagine recovering from. Vanessa seemed strong under the weight of that responsibility though and just held Charity firmer. A soft and assured kiss was placed on the crown of her head.

“I’m going nowhere” Vanessa replied fervently.

They were perhaps the three most important words that Charity wanted to hear.

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback greatly appreciated. Oh and lots of love to the Vanity fandom - because you are all amazing.


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